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  • Published Date

    January 15, 2022
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VAMPIRES IN JOLIET! The Blood Suckers are Here. HOLD ON TO YOUR NECK You know about vampires. They are bad juju. It's easy to find out about the nocturnal habits of these individuals. Just watch cable TV. One of the earliest movies is Nosferatu. That was made in 1922 in Germany. It was a silent movie that scared the named Max Shreck. Many have said that ole Max was a vampire for real. The director of the film was F. W. Murnau, He was a member of the Brotherhood of Saturn. Saturn in this case was not the planet but was the Roman God of Death. That guy had to be pretty weird too. And the movie itself was so dark and scary that the courts in Germany ordered that the film be withdrawn from theaters and that every copy of the film be destroyed, Wow. FREE Personal Checking out of people. The star of the movie was a guy No minimum balance required No monthly service fee $100 minimum opening deposit Unlimited transactions Did you know that Abraham Lincoln's mother was killed by a vampire? Yeah, when Abe was only 13. So, before becoming president, Honest Abe was hunting and killing vampires. And his knowledge of vampires helped win the civil war. Yep, the vampires were attacking union soldiers and, in a major battle, the soldiers shot them with silver bulets and sent them all back to wherever. How do we know this? Because it's on TV. It's all in a movie called Abraham Lincoln, Vampire Hunter. And if it's on TV, it has to be true. Right? Monthly statements (Choose paper or electronic) FREE: Debit Card Online and Mobile Banking Bill Pay But how about the Vampires in Joliet. Yep, they're here. But they don't go by the name of Dracula. Their name is "Other Banks." And they don't suck the blood from people's necks. They suck the financial blood from people's bank accounts. It's something that they call "fees." Many banks charge you a fee if the balance in your checking account goes below several thousand dollars. OK, so maybe now you have the resources to keep several thousand dollars in your account, How about when you were young? Did you always have thousands of dollars in your checking account? Probably not. So why do business with a bank that would have taken your money as a punishment when you didn't have much money? Look in the right hand column of this ad. It says that we offer Free Personal Checking accounts. Yeah, Free, Whether you have $100 or $100,000, it's free. We don't punish people because of their finances. Isn't that the kind of bank that you should be doing business with? We're here on the corner of Essington and Caton Farm Roads. Come see us. We're waiting for you. Call for Monster CD Rates Joliet's Locally-Owned and Locally-Managed Billion Dollar Community Bank st 2398 Essington Rd (Comer of Essington and Caton Farm Rd) FIRST SECURE (815) 230-8000 Visit 1stsecurebank.com COMMUNITY BANK OF JOLIET MEMBER We 're not just your bank, we're your neighbor! FDIC EQUAL THOUSING VAMPIRES IN JOLIET! The Blood Suckers are Here. HOLD ON TO YOUR NECK You know about vampires. They are bad juju. It's easy to find out about the nocturnal habits of these individuals. Just watch cable TV. One of the earliest movies is Nosferatu. That was made in 1922 in Germany. It was a silent movie that scared the named Max Shreck. Many have said that ole Max was a vampire for real. The director of the film was F. W. Murnau, He was a member of the Brotherhood of Saturn. Saturn in this case was not the planet but was the Roman God of Death. That guy had to be pretty weird too. And the movie itself was so dark and scary that the courts in Germany ordered that the film be withdrawn from theaters and that every copy of the film be destroyed, Wow. FREE Personal Checking out of people. The star of the movie was a guy No minimum balance required No monthly service fee $100 minimum opening deposit Unlimited transactions Did you know that Abraham Lincoln's mother was killed by a vampire? Yeah, when Abe was only 13. So, before becoming president, Honest Abe was hunting and killing vampires. And his knowledge of vampires helped win the civil war. Yep, the vampires were attacking union soldiers and, in a major battle, the soldiers shot them with silver bulets and sent them all back to wherever. How do we know this? Because it's on TV. It's all in a movie called Abraham Lincoln, Vampire Hunter. And if it's on TV, it has to be true. Right? Monthly statements (Choose paper or electronic) FREE: Debit Card Online and Mobile Banking Bill Pay But how about the Vampires in Joliet. Yep, they're here. But they don't go by the name of Dracula. Their name is "Other Banks." And they don't suck the blood from people's necks. They suck the financial blood from people's bank accounts. It's something that they call "fees." Many banks charge you a fee if the balance in your checking account goes below several thousand dollars. OK, so maybe now you have the resources to keep several thousand dollars in your account, How about when you were young? Did you always have thousands of dollars in your checking account? Probably not. So why do business with a bank that would have taken your money as a punishment when you didn't have much money? Look in the right hand column of this ad. It says that we offer Free Personal Checking accounts. Yeah, Free, Whether you have $100 or $100,000, it's free. We don't punish people because of their finances. Isn't that the kind of bank that you should be doing business with? We're here on the corner of Essington and Caton Farm Roads. Come see us. We're waiting for you. Call for Monster CD Rates Joliet's Locally-Owned and Locally-Managed Billion Dollar Community Bank st 2398 Essington Rd (Comer of Essington and Caton Farm Rd) FIRST SECURE (815) 230-8000 Visit 1stsecurebank.com COMMUNITY BANK OF JOLIET MEMBER We 're not just your bank, we're your neighbor! FDIC EQUAL THOUSING